How to Stay Grounded While You Wait
Waiting for a transplant can bring a mix of emotions. Learn ways to stay grounded, manage uncertainty, and take care of your mental health through the process.
Medically reviewed by Jessie J. Danforth RN, BSN
Last updated: September 8, 2026
Medically reviewed by Jessie J. Danforth RN, BSN
Last updated: September 8, 2026
Waiting for a transplant can feel unpredictable and emotionally draining. It’s common to move through a mix of emotions, from anxiety to frustration, hope and fear—sometimes all in the same day. This kind of emotional ups and downs is a normal part of the process, not a sign that you’re not coping. Support and simple coping strategies can help you stay steady as you move through it.
When the waiting starts to wear on you
Over time, the experience of waiting can change. What may begin as hope can slowly turn into fatigue, frustration, or even moments of feeling stuck.
These ups and downs are a normal part of waiting, and most people don’t move through them in a straight line. Some days feel manageable, while others may feel heavier.
You might notice yourself feeling:
Drained by the constant waiting
Caught between progress and uncertainty
Frustrated by how much of it is out of your control
One way to move through this is by reframing the wait. Instead of thinking of it as passive, it can help to focus on what’s within your control: your health, your routines, and how you prepare for what’s next.
When a call doesn’t lead to transplant
Getting a call for a transplant that doesn’t move forward is more common than many people expect and it can be emotionally difficult. These situations happen because the care team needs to be certain the kidney is the right match for you. Taking that extra step helps protect your long-term health, even if it’s disappointing in the moment.
You might experience:
A surge of hope followed by disappointment
A sudden emotional drop or “crash”
If this happens, it can help to:
Give yourself permission to feel what you’re feeling
Remind yourself that this process is about finding the safest, best match for your long-term outcome.
Reach out for support, and talk with others who have been through it before and can relate.
5 Tips for staying grounded
1. Stay connected Keep in touch with your transplant psychologist or psychiatrist, a counselor, or people you trust. You don’t have to go through this alone.
2. Let yourself feel—but then create space It’s ok to experience difficult emotions. Try to acknowledge them without letting them take over your entire day.
3. Focus on what you can control You may not control the timing, but you can focus on your health, your routines, and how you prepare.
4. Ground yourself physically Small actions can help you feel more steady. Spend time outside, move your body, or create moments of calm in your day
5. Ask for help early on Support is part of your care. Reaching out for emotional or mental health support is a strong and important step.
There’s no “right” way to feel during this time. Some days will be harder than others, and that’s part of the process. Staying grounded isn’t about having it all figured out, it’s about taking things one day at a time and continuing forward. And that in itself deserves credit.
Stories and perspectives from transplant patients
The views expressed are those of the patient based on their individual experience. Experiences and outcomes may vary from person to person.
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CareDx is committed to providing scientifically supported educational content for transplant recipients and caregivers. All content is for educational purposes only and is not intended to serve as medical advice or replace guidance from your healthcare provider. Always seek the advice of your transplant team with any questions you may have regarding your specific medical condition.